|Vintage Phoenix Coyotes logo...|
3:00 PM (Eastern time): The zamboni driver is late. He's been trying to get out of an Atlanta jail for many months now...
4:47 PM: Jets head coach Claude Noel gives his team a pre-game pep talk, warning them not to get caught up in all of the excitement and hype of the crowd, especially because most players on the team have never played a home game in front of as many as 15,000 people before. He then turns to Kyle Wellwood and throws out his box of doughnuts.
4:50 PM: Dustin Byfuglien puts his jersey on and wonders why they had to put an airplane on the logo instead of something more his type, such as a boat.
4:57 PM: A fan asks Gary Bettman for his autograph. Bettman flinches, expecting to be tackled by the fan, then asks what an autograph is. There's a first for everything, I guess.
5:03 PM: Don Cherry steps onto the ice. As he does, Ron MacLean accidentally bumps into his chin, but Cherry forgives him, because it wasn't an intentional headshot.
5:06 PM: Player intros. As Evander Kane skates out, he sees many many hockey jerseys that say Winnipeg Jets on them, but they look weird. They're clearly before his time.
5:15 PM: During the National Anthem, Dustin Byfuglien stares down Brian Gionta and cracks his knuckles. Gionta hides behind Carey Price's blocker.
1st Period: After being slashed in the leg by a skate, Mike Cammelleri skates to the bench trying to get to the locker room, but can't find the locker room.
2nd Period: After getting beat on a second straight Canadiens' goal, Johnny Oduya asks Noel if there's any way to quiet the crowd so he can pay more attention on the ice.
2nd Intermission: Jets lose. Oh, oops, wrong sport...
3rd Period: Nik Antropov finally gets the Jets on the board, as he stuffs in a loose puck in the crease. Neighboring towns call the police in fear of an earthquake.
3rd Period: Dustin Byfuglien taps into Brian Gionta, sending him flying and drawing a penalty for Montreal and opening the floodgates.
3rd Period: As the final seconds wind down, fans give the team a standing ovation as they trail 5-1, which supports CBC's comments that Winnipeg fans are much more informed than Atlanta fans were.
End of Game: Jets lose (think I got it right this time...).
Postgame: Fans begin to realize that this isn't going to be as easy as they thought. So, to compensate, they begin to take a look at 2012 NHL Entry Draft projections.
8:13 PM: A fan taps into a referee's car, sending it spinning across the parking lot out of control, but the fan drives away without stopping.
11:20 PM: Even without the Thrashers, the city of Atlanta keeps losing as the Falcons fall to the Packers, giving up 25 unanswered points, which is more than the Thrashers ever gave up in one game.