Monday, February 28, 2011

What you didn't hear on NHL Trade Deadline Day

Penner, Richards, Vokoun, Arnott, even John Mitchell, were all either traded or rumored to be traded on 2011 NHL Trade Deadline Day, plus many more. While just over a dozen trades actually registered today, there are plenty of deals that just never worked out. As you know, I was able to obtain a script of certain phone calls that were made throughout the day. Take a look.


Glen Sather --> Joe Nieuwendyk - 4:49 AM: Hey Joe, I guess you're still asleep. Anyway, get back to me ASAP! I think I have a deal that you can't refuse for Brad Richards!

Joe Nieuwendyk --> Glen Sather - 6:07 AM: Dammit, Glen, do you ever sleep?

Glen Sather: Nope, neither does my city!

Joe Nieuwendyk: Anyway, what are you willing to give me for Brad?

Glen Sather: Well, since he is injured right now and is a free agent at the end of the year, I'd be willing to send one of my highly regarded minor league defensemen and a 1st round pick to Dallas.

Joe Nieuwendyk: Glen, we've talked about this before, Wade Redden doesn't count as a highly regarded minor league defenseman.


Garth Snow (6:47 AM): G'mornin' Mike!

Mike Gillis: Hey, Garth.

Garth Snow: Hey, look, I was interested in trading for Alex Burrows, and...

Mike Gillis: For the 100th time, I already have one goalie with a massive contract, I'm not interested in another.

Garth Snow: Hmm, maybe you're right. Oh, actually, Stephane Auger is officiating a bunch of our games coming up, so maybe it's not a good idea.


Dean Lombardi (7:18AM): Hey, Lou, any chance you'll budge on Ilya?

Lou Lamoriello: Not a chance, besides, even if I did trade him, the league would probably reject the trade and fine me more draft picks. I'm really not interested in going to arbitration again.

Dean Lombardi: Fine. Fair enough. How's your trade deadline day going so far?

Lou Lamoriello: Status Quo. You want Jason Arnott? ... Dean? ... Dean??


Peter Chiarelli (8:29 AM): Hey, Brian, you've been of great service to me over the past couple of years, maybe you'll want to help me again?

Brian Burke: Sure, Pete, what's up?

Peter Chiarelli: Well, I have this defenseman, his name is Tomas Kaberle, maybe you've heard the name before. Anyway, he hasn't been great with us, but I'm sure he'd fit right into your Leafs team.

Brian Burke: Interesting...

Peter Chiarelli: Yeah, so what do you think? Two first rounders and maybe, hmm, Phil Kessel in return?

Brian Burke: No. I've done that before. People haven't forgiven me.

Peter Chiarelli: Dammit. (in background:) "Guys, he didn't fall for it."


George McPhee (9:55 AM): Hey, Ray, I don't suppose you want to do the Crosby for Ovechkin trade this year, do you?

Ray Shero: Nah, maybe next year.

George McPhee: Okay, sounds great. Crap, I think I see Pierre McGuire spying on me. Gotta run.


Pierre Gauthier (10:03 AM): Steve, I think I really have something you'll like.

Steve Tambellini: Okay, shoot.

Pierre Gauthier: How about Dustin Penner for Ben Maxwell and Maxim Lapierre?

Steve Tambellini: Pierre, you traded both of those guys already.

Pierre Gauthier: Oh. Hang on, let me call Don Cherry and see what he says.

Steve Tambellini: Pierre, who are you kidding, you won't make a trade if it was the last thing you did...Pierre?

Pierre Gauthier (1:27 PM): Man, that Don Cherry, he loves to talk...


Stan Bowman: Hey, Bryan, I like this Campoli guy. What'll he cost me?

Bryan Murray: Eh, couple draft picks.

Stan Bowman: Hmm, I'll give you three 10th round draft picks.

Bryan Murray: Okay, it's a deal.

Stan Bowman: Umm, I'm not sure if I should tell you, but there's no 10th round.

Bryan Murray: Oh. Well, maybe just a 7th round pick. You know, we like to pile up on 7th round draft picks.


Brian Burke to himself (2:59 PM): Ugh. I need to make at least one trade today. But who? YES! I know, I'll trade for Kyle Wellwood! Let me call his agent!

Wellwood's agent: Hey, Brian, what's up?

Brian Burke: Where's Kyle? I want to bring him back to Toronto.

Wellwood's agent: Well, he's actually out eating with his friends over at Burger King. He's been there since last night. Should I have him call you back?

Brian Burke: No, it's 3 PM, it's too late.


Peter Chiarelli (3:16 PM): Hey, Joe, just kicking the tires on Brad. Guess you didn't get a good offer for him. I was wondering what you think it would take to land him and sneak a last deal in?

Joe Nieuwendyk: A lot.

Peter Chiarelli: Prospect and a 1st rounder?

Joe Nieuwendyk: More.

Peter Chiarelli: Chara?

Joe Nieuwendyk: More. I mean, a LOT more.

Peter Chiarelli: You don't mean...

Joe Nieuwendyk: Yes. I want Gregory Campbell.

Peter Chiarelli: Forget it.